Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Halfway is halfway, is halfway, is halfway...

Hmm half way done…more than half way done actually.  I’m not really sure how I feel about it now.  Have I really stayed here this long already?  In some instances yes, I can believe I’ve been here for 67 days and sometimes I can’t. 

I can because everything has fallen into a routine now.  School is in session (finally), midterms are coming up, and I understand the vibe and way of the city now.  I know where things are, I know what’s open during the siesta hours and what’s not, I have my favorite spot, I’ve made amazing friends, I know what food I like and what I don’t, and this place is starting to feel more like a home than just a vacation of sorts….

I am still going to school let’s not forget, so even though it may seem that I travel everywhere and have a lot of free time on my hands, that’s not necessarily the case…although I do find the school system here less stressful of that of America.  The only things we are graded on here are two tests.  A midterm and a final.  No homework assignments, no pop quizzes, NADA.  Which is good and bad.  Good because I do have more time to explore and do the things that I want to do, and bad because well let’s face it, you do bad on the test….you do bad in the class.  There are no cushion points to help you out in case you slip a little.  But to me I find the two tests a good match for me.  Homework is practice therefore, you shouldn’t be graded on it.  Those who try and practice with the homework will do well, while those that could give a hoot will do poorly.  And being a semi-nerd myself, I always do the homework anyways.  :)  I guess the midterm grades will ultimately determine whether this type of teaching fits me or not…let’s hope it does!!!!

Enough with school now.  I have to go to it tomorrow anyways so let’s not dwell on that fact for too long..

I also can’t believe it’s almost over because..well.. I just can’t!!  It’s kinda hard to explain, but even though I’ve been going to school now for over a month and I’ve been here for over 2 I still feel like I’m living a dream and I’m gonna wake up any second.  I look back on my little countdown calendar and think, “Crap that happened 4 weeks ago?!  Where the hell did the weeks in between go?”  My mind is a constant session of flashbacks to memories past.  I’ll sit down and think of when I first left, arriving in Madrid, the first few days with my mom, meeting the group, getting to Sevilla, first nerve racking days of insecurity, making friends, going to Portugal, school starting, random nights in Sevilla, adventures with friends, and so on.  And then I have flashbacks to the future if that’s even possible!  I see myself packing, leaving Sevilla, getting on the bus to Madrid, airport, tearful goodbyes, London, waiting impatiently, flying across the ocean staring out the window until I see the first sight of American land, landing, approaching the gate, walking through customs, running down the hallway into the awaiting arms of family, and tearful hellos. 

It’s clear to me now that I am clearly in the middle of my entire journey.  I’ve done so much, yet have a while to go.  Its crosses my mind a few times as to why I made the decision to only stay for a semester rather than an entire year.  Time has already gone by pretty fast and I feel like I could do sooo much more with another semester.  I know where everything is now, I know how everything functions, and I’m no longer afraid of this city.  In some regards I do wish I had signed up for the year, but I'm not sure if I would’ve liked it as much.  Leaving friends back home and having to make new ones is fun, but doing it twice can get old.  It’s fun to make new friends, but it is a bit challenging too when you’ve had the same friends since FOREVER.  (all ya’ll out there know who you are. :)  )  And it’s not like you become friends randomly..you are almost forced to be friends in a way because you have no one else.  Luckily all the people I’ve meet are simply amazing and I wouldn’t have met them if it wasn’t for this trip.  ALL IN ALL I’m am very thankful for the friends I’ve made here, so please don’t think I’m complaining.  I’m not sure if I described that well or not, but I suppose to really understand you will just have to live in another country for 4 months.  :)  haha!  It’s something only the select few will ever know.  :)  I'm not really sure if I would have enough classes to take here anyways seeing as how ill only have 2 Spanish classes left to take when I get back home, so honestly I don't know if I could have stayed for a year and gotten credit for it.  I think everything has worked out for the better and the way it was meant to be.      

To whoever hears me now, I await my return to the place I’m from, but anticipate a return to the place that changed my life. 

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